Utter humiliation.
Those are the only words to use right now.
I went downstairs to our cafeteria for lunch today. I met up with a couple of friends from the office and we caught up over salads.
As we were getting up to leave, one of the girls looked down and said, "I love your shoes! They are so cute!"
"Thanks!" I smiled that someone noticed because I too, love the shoes.
Basking in my shoe glow, I headed up the stairs. Suddenly I jerked back a bit and my left foot was bare. I grabbed the handrail and looked down - my shoe was sitting on the stairs. Everyone laughed as I leaned down to grab my shoe and said, "That could have gotten ugly. Thankfully, I have cat-like reflexes."
Me and my big mouth.
I took another step and lunged forward. With no handrail close by, my knee hit the stairs as my arms flew forward to brace myself. I'm pretty sure my skirt flew up higher than appropriate in the workplace. The shoe tumbled down four stairs and landed upright, mocking me. After the girls ensured that I was ok, they all dissolved into giggles. The giggles then turned to outright cackling. I couldn't blame them; I was laughing my ass off as well.
As I was adjusting my skirt and making my third attempt up the stairs I joked, "Well at least *insert CEO's name here* wasn't standing at the top of the stairs."
"Yeah, because that would be humiliating." I immediately recognized the voice.
This cannot be happening to me.
I looked up to see our CEO standing there with half of our Marketing department.
He laughed and asked if I was ok. I could feel my face turning various shades of red as I told him that I was fine. I took baby steps all the way back to my office.
If anyone's looking for me, I'll be sitting in my office not making any sudden movements and pondering what my ass-flashing, body-contorting, knee-bruising trip is doing for my career.
8 comments:
oh no! Maybe it's time to go home. And have red wine and chocolate for dinner. Just watch out for the swarm of locust.
Ahhahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa!!
I'm laughing with you, not at you. Because I've witnessed your grace and panache before. *Snort*
Seriously, I'm trying to be supportive here, but the mental picture, well, it's priceless.
I am sooo sorry. That happened to me in public transport once, but I was the only one I knw.
It could've been worse. You could've taken someone's pants with you.
ha!! I love that one!!!
Cursed shoes!!! Sorry darling!
Just think, maybe you've showed your versatility in the work place and there's a big fat pay raise for the girl who bared it all for a pair of shoes.
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Thomas,
Carrie was on a runway at a fashion show and Stanford called her "Fashion Roadkill". Her underwear were intentionally showing.
I, on the other hand, had no INTENT to show my unmentionables. And I was more like "Career Roadkill".
Subtle difference.
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