Depth Perception: The ability of an observer to judge the spatial relationships of objects, especially their relative distance from the observer and from one another.
My friend Rosie has always teased me about my depth perception. Several years ago, I had to take a vision test. I’ve always had extraordinarily good vision. Better than 20/20, actually. I knew I would breeze through it and I did…until they tested my depth perception. The man administering the tests had been commenting on how excellent my vision was, how we only had one more test and then I should be done. Roughly 45 minutes later, I left with a huge stamp on my paperwork that read Depth Perception: FAILED. For those of you who don’t know me, I don’t fail tests. I just don’t. It’s not my thing.
“Maybe I could take the test again? I know I have depth perception. Seriously, let’s just try one more time.”
At this point I was waving the paper with the red ink like a crazy woman in the lobby of the medical center. I don’t do well with failure and I wasn’t about to fail some damn eye test. I guess you could say I’m a bit neurotic about success sometimes.
A few days later, Rosie and I were headed to a bar to meet some friends and I was telling her about failing my test. Evidently, Rosie thought I was following the car in front of us just a little too closely and commented that maybe the test was right. Later that night as we were pulling into my garage, I accidentally pulled in too close and hit the shelves a little bit. This, of course, only sealed Rosie’s belief that I have no depth perception.
Lately, I’m the one questioning my depth perception. Let me rephrase that: I’m questioning my depth perception when it comes to people. I feel like I can’t tell the spatial relationship in some of my relationships and it’s starting to bother me. The worst part is that I can’t really pinpoint what happened. I don’t know what it is but something just feels...distant. In some cases, it’s blatant distance. In other cases, it’s more discreet. Either way, I feel like I’ve gotten the FAILED stamped lately and the big, red letters are mocking me.
I can’t stand my inability read the distance. Too close? Too far?
“Seriously, let’s just try one more time.”
6 comments:
I have horrible depth perception. It was bad when I played softball in junior high and they put me in the outfield...
I love how you compared your literal depth perception problem with not being able to read relationships clearly. I have the same problem. I never have any idea where I stand or what I mean to someone...too often this is how I get my heart broken.
You would make a fortune if you invented some relationship glasses.
Oh, and am now afraid to drive with you.
Did I mention I've started a blog? :)
I had no idea there was a test for this? Really? I am terrible, I would fail too (especially around a certain time then I am deadly!).
Love the way you compared it with relationships :)
What a great post! Funny, witty, and smart. Perfect :)
Post a Comment