I’m pretty sure I’m going to hell and I’ll tell you why…in list fashion, of course.
1) I accidentally ran over a bunny driving to work this morning. I didn’t mean to but I couldn’t avoid him. I, of course, started to cry when I stopped the car and when I looked over, there was another bunny on the side of the road looking at me like I was the Grim Reaper.
2) I got home last night and saw that the lights on my neighbor’s mini van were on. I went to their door to tell them but no one answered. I told myself I’d check back in an hour. I totally forgot. Instead, I took a bath and curled up in bed because clearly, I’m more concerned with my own personal pampering needs.
3) I had a 2-hour conference call today during which I yelled “SHUT UP!” in my head approximately 1,243,506 times because I was bored by the subject matter.
4) I saw a woman with gum on her pants this weekend and didn’t tell her it was there.
And my personal favorite:
5) Yesterday at the park, there was a little boy jumping around on a tree stump. Barley went over to inspect and the little boy made a motion like he was going to kick Barley. I assured him that Barley was very sweet and wouldn’t hurt him. The kid stuck his tongue out at me. As we walked by, the kid jumped up on the stump again and yelled, “I rule everything!!!” Then he turned too quickly, his ankle slipped and he fell off the stump. I managed to hold in the laughter until I was about 50 feet away and then I laughed so hard I had tears coming down my cheeks.
I’m sure karma is going to bitch-slap me any moment now…
11 comments:
Rotten little thing deserved it. Motioning like he was going to kick Barley!!!!
Brat.
At least you waited until he left!
He totally deserved it, little turd. I would've laughed right at him (if his parents weren't watching!)
hey the world has kicked the shit out of you the last couple of momnths, i'd say you're about even
so sorry to hear about the bunny. we have all had such terrible experiences, but i just hate that you had to deal with that, especially first thing in the a.m. it sucketh.
i am personally quite impressed that you waited until you were away from the little crumb snatcher before laughing. parents or no parents around, i would have giggled right at him so that he could learn about karma. would have even explained karma to the tyke.
heck, that little ankle twist probably saved the world from the next serial murderer...they start by abusing animals, right???!!?! brat.
whew, i must be about to be "exceptionally female" today...yep, it is about the right time of the month to make me a tornado of anger (especially towards anyone who would contemplate hurting such an adorable pup)
sigh.
i'm going for chocolate!
maybe it's because i live in new york city, but none of those things seem all that bad to me. you had good intentions in all circumstances!
this coming from someone who CANNOT stifle laughter when ANYONE falls...
You know what those things sound perfectly okay to me. Just duck tell karma to stand on the stump a minute and get a few steps away.
is it possible that karma got confused and bitch-slapped me, instead?? i had to kill a MASSIVE cockroach in my apt this am (near my BED nontheless)! well, if karma's on its way for you, at least you entertained us with these hilarious stories in the process! :)
You know, I tend to agree with Amanda and Croaker - those things don't seem all that bad... well, ok, the bunny incident sucked, but it wasn't on puropse... the rest are just things anyone would do if they were in your shoes. Well, ok, things I would do, at least! ;)
Yeah the conference call one is totally ok.
But at least you didn't yell out loud during the conference call...I think you're ok, really. That kid should watch out for his karma though.
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