Bittersweet Symphony

There were four seats in the front row of the groom's side of the chapel. My cousin, Jordan and I sat down and a few moments later, my cousin, Bradley, escorted his mom to her seat next to us. The seat closest to the aisle was empty and would remain that way for the ceramony.

The look on Bradley's face when his bride started down the aisle was absolutely priceless and something that I'll always remember. I've seen the kid smile a million times but the look in his eyes was pure and honest love. After her father lifted her veil and kissed her, she took Bradley's hands in her own and mouthed the words, "I love you."

At one point during the ceremony I remembered a summer many years ago. When my Aunt Carol was pregnant with Bradley, his original due date was my birthday. He arrived six days before my 7th birthday. My Uncle Brad would always have joint birthday parties for us - the kids playing in the pool, the women scurring around the kitchen and the men at the bar-b-ques. One summer, just before the party was about to begin, I was out on the deck blowing up balloons. Bradley had followed me outside and had a huge grin on his face when he saw all of the balloons. I was just finishing the last one when it popped in my face. It hit my eye and though I wasn't really hurt, it stung and I started to cry. He instantly threw his arms around my legs and started crying too. When a few of my aunts came outside to see what happened he cried even more. My mom tried to assure him that I was ok and after wiping a few giant tears from his brown eyes he asked, "Auntie Stella, are you sure she's not going to die?" He was four at the time.

The lump in his throat was audible as he said his vows to Katie. And when the minister mentioned the empty seat and the man for whom it was saved I could see, through my own tears, the tears in Bradley's eyes. I have missed my uncle a million times a day since we lost him last spring but the pain was its most acute sitting there without him at his son's wedding.

After the ceremony, we all went outside to take a few pictures. It was bitterly cold and though the snow hadn't yet started, the pink grey clouds told of what was to come. We all huddled together for warmth and laughed as the photographer tried to keep his balance on the sheet of ice he stood upon.

When it came time for their first dance, Josh, the best man, pulled out his guitar and sang as Katie rested her head on Bradley's shoulder and they slowly moved across the floor. I snapped picture after picture and said a silent prayer of thanks that we had made it to this day.

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Driving home from Wyoming after Thanksgiving, I'd received a voicemail from Katie.

"Kendra, I'm not sure if anyone has been able to get ahold of you but I really need to talk to you. Call me as soon as you get this."

The tone of her voice terrified me and I knew something was really wrong. When I called her back she told me everything - that Bradley had a seizure and was in a coma. He was on life support and no one really knew what was wrong with him.

I couldn't find the words to ask all the questions I had racing around in my head.

"But Katie, I just talked to him Thanksgiving morning. He was asking how to cut up the onion and carrots for the turkey. He said he thought he had the flu. How the hell did he end up in a coma?"

She didn't have any answers because no one could tell her anything.

"Just come to the hospital as soon as you're back in Denver."

So I drove for seven hours not knowing anything. It was a long seven hours.

When I walked into ICU that night he was hooked up to a million machines. Tubes were running in every direction and the heart monitor beeped behind him. Usually, I'm the strong one, the person who keeps it together when everyone else is losing it. Not this time. I backed up until I felt the wall behind me and with a deep sigh I started to cry. My hands were shaking uncontrollably and I felt like I was suffocating.

What he thought was the flu ended up being encephalitis. It is extremely rare and can cause brain damage or be fatal. He was in a coma for four days. He was in the hospital for over a week. He was on anti-virals for a month. He will probably be on anti-seizure medicine for the rest of his life. But he's alive and according to his doctors, it's amazing he has no long-term damage.

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At one point during the reception, I stopped dancing and picked up the camera again to get more pictures. I took my eye away from the viewfinder to see Bradley walking towards me with a drink in his hand.

"I thought you might want one of these."

He flashed me one of his classic smiles as he put his arm around my shoulder. He kissed the top of my head and said, "I'm so happy you're here." A moment later, he walked towards his bride to dance again.

And as I watched him go I thought to myself, "You took the words right out of my mouth."