I have my second miserable head cold of 2010. The first one came just after the new year began and I was in bad shape for two weeks. This one seems to be getting better after a couple of days so I'm hopeful. I think I caught the cold on a flight back from D.C. last week. I had a window seat and was sitting next to the human petri dish who refused to cover his mouth when he coughed or sneezed. He had a body odor that was a combination of urine and sweat. And then he took off his shoes for the 4 hour flight. The smell was delightful. And then, as if that wasn't enough, 10 minutes before we landed he pulled a foot-long Subway sandwich from his bag. It was something with a lot of cured meats and vinegar and it smelled so god-awful when combined everything else nearly sent me over the edge. It took everything I had not to beat him about the head and body with my book and fists. I kept thinking I would be arrested by air marshalls. And that arrest would, of course, make the news and my family and friends would see me being hauled off in handcuffs while screaming something about sneezing and meat. And then I thought about you guys, the few readers I have left, who would find out via the 10 o'clock news that I was still alive but had clearly lost my ever-loving mind because instead of writing, I now assault rude, thoughtless people on airplanes.
Anyway, I'm alive and I've missed writing so I'm back. Not making any promises on frequency or quality but I'm back.
1 comment:
Merideth once had to ask a seatmate to please put his shoes back on because of the smell. She had to do it on my behalf because of how I was clutching the barf bag to my face and retching.
I'm pretty sure when people imagined the ease of airplane travel back in days of yore, they didn't imagine that jackassery would just take place a mile high.
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