The Good Old Days

So here I am, trying to write again. I always have the best intentions when I say I'm going to write on this blog again but then stuff happens and I don't. But the thing is, writing makes me happy. It's a stress reliever. And even my very worst writing is good because it's a creative outlet for me and lately I've realized that some form of creativity is necessary in life for me to be happy.

I won't try to fill in the last couple of years on here because a) that feels overwhelming and I don't need overwhelming right now and b) I doubt anyone who read this blog back in the day still reads now so no point in the update. I'm sure there will be some stories from the past because there are just some that should be shared...

New Year, New Look

Two posts in two days. I'm on fire. I decided it was high time to give the old blog a facelift. New template, new pics, new posts.

I'm ending 2010 highly motivated and am hoping I can take that motivation into 2011. Because truth be told, I have a very good feeling about the new year.

Let's see what happens...

Year in Review - 2010

1. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?
Traveled to Alaska and love, love, LOVED it. Went white-water rafting which I also loved.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I didn't really make any in 2010. I'll work on some for 2011.


3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Oh for sure! Karen had baby Finn *swoon*. Amber had the lovely baby Piper. Rosie had baby Brady *more swooning*, Meghan had gorgeous baby Kerry and Blair had sweet baby Emily. My friends make the most beautiful babies.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Thankfully, no.

5. What countries did you visit?
Once again I was only stateside this year. End of year plans to go to Mexico or the Carribean were thwarted when I realized my passport had expired and it would be a while before I could get a new one. A mistake I will never repeat, I promise.

6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?
A steady workout routine.

7. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
No date jumps off the calendar for me.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
My promotion in March.

9. What was your biggest failure?
I can't even talk about it. But trust, it was big.


10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No illnesses but I did manage to pass out at the doctors office, fell off the examination table and went face first into the wall. I awoke with blood all over my face, a huge gash on my nose and two black eyes. And a headache that didn't go away for 8 days. It was sexy and graceful and oh so me.


11. What was the best thing you bought?
My new kitchen. It's dreamy.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
A good friend who went through a horrible divorce and could have turned mean and nasty but held her head high and was all class. And Sandra Bullock...for similar reasons.


13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Aforementioned friend's lousy ex-husband. And Jesse James....for similar reasons.


14. Where did most of your money go?
It's all about the charming 106-year-old bungalow.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Road trip with my sister, Kelsey, in May.


16. What song will always remind you of 2010?
Bruno Mars - "Just the Way You Are"


17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Depends on the topic. Some things happier, some things much sadder.

b) thinner or fatter? Fatter. Which is one of the things I'm sadder about. *sigh*

c) richer or poorer? Richer. Which is one of the things I'm happier about.


18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Exercised, traveled for fun, danced, blogged.


19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Gotten wrapped around the axel about things over which I had NO control.


20. How did you spend Christmas?
Surrounded by friends and family with yummy food, presents, laughter...and wishing for some damn snow.

21. Did you fall in love in 2010?
The only falling I did this year was into that wall at the doctor's office.

22. What was your favorite TV program?
30 Rock, Glee

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
No.

24. What was the best book you read?
Loved "Breakfast with Buddha".

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Not sure I made any discoveries but a few that I loved...

One Republic - Secrets (On repeat for a while this year)

Adele - Rollin in the Deep (I can't even tell you how excited I am for her new album)

Katy Perry - Teenage Dream (Pop at it's best)

Cee Lo - Fuck You (Happiest bitter song ever)

Florence + The Machine - Dog Days Are Over (You should hear me belt this one out in the shower. I actually sang into a shampoo bottle one day and I blame this song for that fact.)

Kanye West - Power (I can run for days when I hear this song)

Jay-Z - Empire State of Mind (Jigga man, I love you so. Way to give Frank a run for his money on NYC's anthem.)

Paramore - The Only Exception (I cried the first time I heard it. Some songs just hit you that way)

Scala & Kolacny Brothers - Creep (May be one of my favorite covers ever.)

26. What did you want and get?
My lovely kitchen, new pots and pans for lovely kitchen.

27. What did you want and not get?
Clive Owen with a vodka neat.


28. What was your favorite film of this year?
I loved "Easy A" as it reminded me of the great teen angst movies of the 80's. And Black Swan, though entirely disturbing, was amazing. (To be fair, I didn't see a ton of movies so if you're wondering where "Inception", "Toy Story 3", "Social Network", etc, etc are on this list, I never got around to seeing them.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?Dinner at Lola's with friends where I allegedly flirted with some guy. But clearly that did not happen as I turned 34 and that is far too old to be flirting with random guys.


30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A long beach-y vacation.


31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?
Too old for the juniors section but too young for misses. Stuck with my standards - GAP, Anthropology, Nordstrom, J. Crew.

32. What kept you sane?
Not sure this was the year for sanity but...I'd say taking the Brown dog for long walks, yoga, laughing with old friends.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Ok, so I saw "Love and Other Drugs" and while the movie was lacking for me, Jake Gyllenhaal was quite enjoyable to look at for two hours. And he's nekkid a lot of the time. Yowza.


34. What political issue stirred you the most?
The oil spill in the Gulf. What a disgusting display of politics, power, money and total lack of concern for the environment.


35. Who did you miss?
Uncle Brad. It's been 4 1/2 years since he died and I still miss him every single day.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
Is it possible for someone to be the best and the worst at the same time? Because he was.


37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010.
Hoping things will fix themselves is utterly idiotic.


38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
Don't need another perfect line
Don't care if critics never jump in line
I'm gonna give all my secrets away

No Jury Would Have Convicted Me

I have my second miserable head cold of 2010. The first one came just after the new year began and I was in bad shape for two weeks. This one seems to be getting better after a couple of days so I'm hopeful. I think I caught the cold on a flight back from D.C. last week. I had a window seat and was sitting next to the human petri dish who refused to cover his mouth when he coughed or sneezed. He had a body odor that was a combination of urine and sweat. And then he took off his shoes for the 4 hour flight. The smell was delightful. And then, as if that wasn't enough, 10 minutes before we landed he pulled a foot-long Subway sandwich from his bag. It was something with a lot of cured meats and vinegar and it smelled so god-awful when combined everything else nearly sent me over the edge. It took everything I had not to beat him about the head and body with my book and fists. I kept thinking I would be arrested by air marshalls. And that arrest would, of course, make the news and my family and friends would see me being hauled off in handcuffs while screaming something about sneezing and meat. And then I thought about you guys, the few readers I have left, who would find out via the 10 o'clock news that I was still alive but had clearly lost my ever-loving mind because instead of writing, I now assault rude, thoughtless people on airplanes.

Anyway, I'm alive and I've missed writing so I'm back. Not making any promises on frequency or quality but I'm back.

You Can Go Ahead and Have My Picture Removed from the Back of the Milk Carton

So my goal to start writing more sort of...um...failed miserably. I've got a lot to say but just haven't been able to sit down and write. I've been feeling out of sorts lately because the insomnia hit again. Actually, it bitch-slapped me, kicked me in the shins, squirted lemon juice in my eyes and gave me four hojillion paper cuts...under my finger nails. I have to say that I wouldn't wish insomnia on anyone. Not on that girl who in 7th grade said I was the "ugliest girl in the school and a total dork". Not on the annoying guy at my Starbucks who rolls his R's when he serves me my grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrande chai latte. And not even on Diane Kruger who spends her nights snuggled up next to MY Josh Jackson. (Gimme a second to poke that image out of my minds eye.) So I'm working on the problem but in the meantime it sucks. I bought a new bed over the weekend and slept in it last night and slept for 7 hours. SEVEN WHOLE HOURS. In one night. There have been several days when I haven't gotten a total of seven hours of sleep so to get them in one night was a little slice of heaven. I'm hoping it continues tonight. Keep your fingers crossed, won't you?

Then there was also the little matter of trying to do some work on a couple of very important relationships in my life. And while I'm not ready to go into all of that just yet, I will say that it's been exhausting. I mean that in a good way because things are a lot better now but getting to the better place has been a long journey.

So to recap:
Insomnia = sucky.
Personal growth = ass-kicking, pride-swallowing and yet totally necessary experience.

Will the World's Worst Blogger Please Stand Up?

Ok, you can't see it but I'm standing.

And now I'm sitting because, lordy, it's hard typing while standing. And because I'm lazy.

So I realize I said I was back to blogging and for a while there I was doing ok. I was going to write all about what had been going on and explain everything. And at first it was going ok. But then it began feeling like a chore; like something I had to do. Telling the whole story just seemed to wear on me. So I stopped. And what I decided was that I don't have to tell the whole story because I lived it. Now, because I'm me, chances are good I will eventually tell the whole story because I think there's some value in telling in, for me I mean. Maybe not so much for you. But right now it just seems like too much to go into. So I think I'll write about whatever.

Without further ado, I give you whatever...

Most all-consuming thing in my life right now:

Finding a new house. I realize it's a buyers market so I'm lucky in that regard. But finding something that has everything I want, in a neighborhood I love is tough. Wait, let me amend that. Find what I want in the right neighborhood is pretty easy, it's paying for it that's not quite as simple. Turns out, I have excellent taste. And said excellent taste doesn't come with a cheap price tag. Go figure. And then there's the whole thing of buying by myself. And yes, I know I should be proud of myself for being able to do it by myself; for saving enough money for a lovely down payment; for getting to a point in my career where my salary will cover a bigger mortgage and still let me buy shoes and take vacations. But then there's the part of me that thinks, "All of the houses you love are nearly 100 years old and though they've been updated, a million things could go wrong and then there you are up shit creek without a paddle...or a clue as to how to fix the thing that is wrong. And if something goes wrong, you have to fix it all by yourself. Because you are the crazy girl who bought a 100 year old house by yourself. By yourself. All by yourself." And then I start singing "All by mysel-he-helf...don't want to be...all by mysellllllllllf. ANYMOOOOOOOOOOOORE!" Yes, I'd like some cheese with my whine.

Super-exciting vacation:

A wonderful trip to Arizona with both of my sister for a long weekend o' fun. Grand Canyon, sunshine, stupid inside jokes, awesome meals, hiking, star-gazing. Oh, doesn't all sound wonderful??? And I'm sure it would have been had the mother-trucking Spring Blizzard of 2009 not hit Denver last Thursday. Our flight was cancelled (as were 499 others out of DIA that day) and wonderful Southwest Airlines couldn't get us to Phoenix until Saturday night. Which was somewhat inconvenient seeing as how we were supposed to fly back Sunday afternoon. Oh the little grey cloud that settled over my head! And if you think one depressed KC is bad, you should see 3. (Yes, we all have the initials KC. Because we're that kind of family. Feel free to wretch a little.) So anyway, my vacation was a bust. But I think the three of us have decided to take white water rafting trip this summer as a replacement vacation. It will be hard for Mother Nature to throw a blizzard our way in July so we feel we've outsmarted her.

Recent Project:

Because I'm a dork who enjoys having a project going at all times. The latest and greatest is the Great Purge of 2009. I'm getting rid of crap. Lots of crap. This little project has been going on for a while but I'm at it with a vengeance now. I don't want to have to move a bunch of stuff I don't need. A sentimental pack-rat by nature, it's difficult for me to part with anything. Actual things uttered/thought by me in this process:

"Oh my god, I can't get rid of this Valentine's Day card from my 4th grade boyfriend!"

"These are the keys from the Saab I had in college. Sure I got rid of that car 8 years ago but who knows if I might need the keys again someday..."
"I know these jeans will fit again. I just know it!"

"I have no idea who most of the people in this picture are but if I took a picture of them they must have meant something at the time."

My newest method of expunging is to ask myself "Would you rescue this in a fire?" If this answer is no, it goes. This is particularly difficult when it comes to my shoes and purses. Because that's a sick sort of Sophie's Choice; I love them all.

Menfolk:

Do you hear the crickets? Yeah, me too.

If one more person tells me that want to set me up with a guy, I might scream. Not because I'm opposed to the idea of a set-up, but because when I ask why they think we might hit it off the answer is almost always, "Well, you're both single and fill-in-the-afterthoughts-here". To me that's like saying, "Well, you both have pulses!" Tell me he's hilarious and kind. Tell me he loves the outdoors and cooking. Dazzle me with his love of travel or the fact that he's always wanted a lab-mix rescue dog. But just saying he's single is about as sexy as telling me that he usually keeps his ball-scratching to a minimum on first dates.

Upcoming Travel:

Palm to the Springs. Becki's wedding is in three weeks and I cannot wait for five days in Palm Springs with some of my oldest and dearest friends. Becki was kind enough to let me pick my own dress (a perk of being the Maid of Honor) and it's cute and comfortable which is a huge plus. We're staying at some swanky hotel (Palm Springs knows how to do swank) and there are 101 fun activities planned. So unless that heartless bitch (aka Mother Nature) decides to stir up another storm, this should be a damn good time.

Super-secret Shame:

Don't judge harshly but I've been reading the Twilight series. I realize I'm 32 and not 14 but they're really addictive. And even worse, I download Taylor Swift's 'Love Story' and have been listening to it for the last two days. If this keeps up I'll be at the new Hannah Montana movie next weekend.

Barley:

Still as brown as ever.

The Foolproof Plan That Wasn't

So as I was saying, 2006 sucked. (Eloquent, I know.)

And then 2007 rolled around. And I was bound and determined to make all of these big changes and to show Life that while it may have bitch-slapped me repeatedly over the course of 2006, I was taking charge in 2007. I had a plan. I decided I was going to make some major changes in my life and instead of doing them one at a time - like a sane person - I did everything at once.

First, I began started Weight Watchers and began working out on a regular basis. My weight has always fluctuated but I'd moved to full-on chubster status. And I didn't like it at all. The weight came off rather easily and I enjoyed the results. I lost almost 30 lbs and felt like a million bucks. And the running was a great way for me to release the stress and anxiety I'd been feeling. At least some of it anyway.

Next, I began planning family get-togethers all the time. Now, my family gets together on a regular basis anyway, but I wanted more. Uncle Brad's house had always been where we would always have events and I was terrified that we wouldn't see each other as often after he died. So I planned event after event in an attempt to keep my family together. And honestly, I think it was one of the smartest things I did that year. I think my family needed that time to be together for fun, happy events like birthdays and bar-b-ques. We needed time together that wasn't spent working on funeral planning or sorting out estate details.

I also began dating again. After the debacle of Mr. Normal...oh hell, let's call a spade a spade. That fool's name was Chris. And he turned out to be anything but normal. Anyway, I decided that wallowing in the ruins of another failed relationship was not the way to go so I took matters into my own hands and signed up for Match. I was so proud of myself for trying. I never thought I'd be the kind of girl who could walk confidently into a coffee shop to meet for a blind date but I did it. It wasn't a huge loss; I met some great guys...just no big spark. And I'm a girl who needs sparks. There was one guy who left me weak in the knees that year. Timing and geography weren't on our side and we both knew our situation was probably impossible. And so it ended. I don't regret a single second with him because good Lord, we had some fun together.

I took golf lessons and worked on big projects at my house. I traveled for work and for fun. I made plans with friends. I killed myself at work and got a promotion. I went running and bike riding. I planned parties for friends and family. I read more books. I took lots of photos and I tried all sorts of new recipes. I kept myself busy and by the end of the year, I realized I'd done almost everything I set out to do. I'd executed my life-improving plan beautifully. Or so I thought.

The one thing I didn't put on my to-do list in 2007 was to deal with the emotional fallout of 2006. I just ignored the pain and when the sadness did creep up, I'd go for a run or stay at work a little later. Or start a new project at the house. Or meet a friend for a drink. But I sure didn't talk about it. Not at all.

So I hid all of those feelings away in 2007. But they didn't stay hidden...and the emotional shit hit the fan in 2008. (Again, so eloquent.)

Don't Call it a Comeback

Guess who feels like writing again?

New stuff up soon explaining where I've been and what's been going on.

I know, I know - you're all breathless with anticipation.

Status Check

Oh, hello.

So this is what it's like to open a new posting on the blog. I'd almost forgotten...

There's a lot to write about but right now, I just don't fee like it. Instead, I feel like eating raspberry sorbet. I feel like taking Barley for long walks. I feel like celebrating my promotion at work. I feel like getting pedicures, having beers and burgers at My Brother's Bar, and watching the Olympics. I feel like buying things for the Labor Day road trip I will soon embark on. I feel like going to watch a movie at Red Rocks with my sisters. I feel like getting rid of junk I don't need. I feel like cooking for him when it's a cold and miserable Friday night. I feel like spending time with my family. I feel like signing up for that class. I feel like ignoring the demands of the too damn demanding. I feel like getting a massage and splurging for 90 minutes. I feel like getting enough sleep and waking up to really good coffee. I feel like reading the Sunday paper cover to cover, watering my flowers and 2 hour phone calls with an old college roommate who understands that sometimes the very best thing anyone can do is just listen and say, "Is there anything I can do to help?"

So maybe when I get done with all of that, I'll feel like writing again.

We'll see...

This Bad Decision Brought to you by the Letters K & C

I'm evidently hell bent on losing every reader I have by only posting once in a blue moon. The funny thing is, I get annoyed with the bloggers I read daily who go a while without posting. And yet I often leave Just Me unattended for weeks at a time. Hypocrisy, thy name is Kendra.

So let's see, what to bring you up to speed on? Well first, would have to be my trip to NYC. Cheryl and I jumped on planes from our respective cities and met up with Marissa in New York. We had such a great time and right about here is where I would post picture after picture but guess what? My effing camera is holding the pics hostage and will not download them to my computer. It's a shame too as there are some really great photos. I had hopes of taking the memory card somewhere this weekend and having the pictures put on a disk but I didn't get around to it. But the trip was awesome and we looked cute the entire time. You'll just have to take my word for it. Or you can make your way over to Cheryl's site and see her pics there. Or you can wait for me to get around to getting mine downloaded. I'm hoping it happens shortly before hell freezes over but let's not hold our collective breath, ok?

In other news, I've been making some bad decisions when it comes to men lately. Ok, so just one man, but he if were a university, I would be majoring in Poor Choices. He is as much of a smartass as myself which is always so attractive to me; however, I usually like the affectionate guy, the guy who gives good hugs and touches alot and this guy is not that guy. Which is a good thing because it made it quite easy to resist any charms he may have because I always assume that if someone isn't as tactile as myself, they must not like me. So thing were fine until...he touched my hair. I like to think of myself as a pretty strong woman but I turn to mush when a man plays with my hair. (Sidebar: In my humble opinion, all men should do three things - without fail - to ensure a happy woman. Thing #1 - Focus on the hair. Duh, I just told you that. Thing #2 - Put your hands on a woman's face when you kiss her. This must be done the right way: the thumbs should be in front of the ear and the other four digits wrapping around the neck. Then pull her in. This raises the Hot Quotient of said kiss, thus exponentially raising the possibility of other activities. And finally, Thing #3 - Place your hand on the small of a woman's back when your walking out of a restaurant or bar...or wherever. It's the non-verbal way of saying "I got your back". And chicks totally dig it. Whew. It's exhausting sharing all of this knowledge. Tune in next week for Three Things a Man Should NEVER Do...) Anywho, there was some hair touchage and he somehow figured out that I enjoy it a great deal. It could have been the heavy sighs or the purring or the drool that began to form at the corners of my mouth that gave it away. Hard telling how he cracked the code. And this lead to...nothing. Seriously, nothing happened. Ok, so we curled up and talked all night and laughed but nothing else. The whole night was rated PG. So you might be wondering why I look at this as a bad decision since it was all PG and you're thinking most of your bad decisions have been rated R (maybe even NC-17 for some of you. I'm not naming any names...cough, cough, Woodrow cough, hack, cough.) But if I told you the full story, the whole enchilada, you would understand. And then you'd probably roll your eyes and sigh a little and be all Hey Kendra, this is a bad idea. And I would be all, I know, I know. And you would be all, I thought you weren't going to date guys like this anymore. And I would be all, OK, I get it. And you would be all, I'm not kidding, this won't end well. And I would get pissed and be all, DON'T JUDGE ME! You're not the boss of me! And then I'd go up to my room and slam the door and you'd sigh that exhausted sigh and say something about how stubborn I am and how I always have to learn the hard way. And I'd blog about how I CAN handle the situation...and about how parents just don't understand. Or something. Anyway, stay tuned for imminent doom. At least it will give me something to write about, right?

Stating the Obvious

I have been in a rut.

What? You have been as witty, clever and insightful as always!, think the handful of readers left out there.

Ok, so there's a lot to bring you guys up to speed on in my little old life. Some major things have been going on since the beginning of the year and I swear, I have been trying to write. But mostly what comes out is total crap. And I just can't subject you guys to anymore total crap. Partial crap might be ok, but total crap? That's where I draw the line. Because I love you.

But March seems to be bringing some good things lately and as a result, I am one happy girl. Alright, so I it's not like rainbows are shooting out of my butt or anything but I am doing better so that's something, right?

So what's been bringing a smile to my face these days? I'm so happy you asked...


1. Daylight! I'm not sure why but this winter really took it out of me. I've always been a fan of seasons but Old Man Winter seemed to be a complete ass this year. The long, cold, dark nights seemed longer, colder and darker than I could stand. But the days are getting longer and despite that I missed an hour of sleep over the weekend (Sidebar: I've had 31 years to get used to that whole "Spring forward" concept and yet, every year it slaps me in the head, kicks me in the shin and spits in my eye.) Anyway, despite the lost hour of sleep, I am so happy that it's light outside at 7pm these days. It means I can take Barley for runs when I get home from work. Runs = endorphine high. Endorphine high = less sitting around being so blue about how long, cold and dark the nights are.

2. G. Love. I recently found a mix tape from a guy I dated in college. It had several G. Love & Special Sauce songs on it like "Sweet Sugar Mama", "I-76" and of course, "Cold Beverage". So I went out to iTunes and downloaded a bunch of old stuff and the newest album, 'Lemonade' . All so good. I drove into the office today listening to "Booty Call" on repeat. The song just makes me laugh. Anyway, if you're not listening to G. Love I have to wonder if you're a communist or perhaps dropped on your head as a small child. Either way, work that stuff out and then go download some stuff. It'll make you feel good; it's a KC guarantee.

3. Job is going so well it's almost scary. I love what I do, where I work and the people I work with everyday. And today, out of the clear blue, my boss walked in and gave me some great news.

4. The dating scene. No, no love connection but good Lord, do I have some stories. I promise those are coming soon too.

5. I have a trip planned in May that is most certainly going to be 8 shades of awesome. Can't. Hardly. Wait.

6. I got a great cut and color last week and I don't care how shallow it sounds, good hair can make a girl feel good.

7. Saturday night involved sushi, vodka and dancing. Good, good and good.

8. Somebody's getting her annual bonus this week. Mama's getting new shoes! (Ok, so really, mama is investing most of it, putting some toward the car loan...but she may put aside a little sumpin sumpin for cute "Going on Vacation in May" shoes.)

I'm going to kick this rut's ass.

Breaking Up is Hard to Do

I have been toying with the idea of breaking up with the blog. Lately, whenever I sit down to write I can't seem to form a coherent sentence. I'm not kidding when I say I've started nine different posts and never finished a one of them. I've been traveling for work a bit and somehow managed to get the seal-bark cough that I had right after the Turkey Trot. And I've been trying to get rid of that damn thing for a week because I have to get on another plane Tuesday morning and head to Austin for the week. (Sidebar: I know there are a couple of readers in Austin. I'd love any recommendations of places I should get to while there so feel free to email me your favorites.)

I digress, back to me ditching the blog.

So yes, I've been thinking about it. Lately, writing seems more like a chore than anything else. Life has left me spread a bit thin these days and when I do have time to myself, I don't want to sit in front of a computer. But as each days passes, I think about how I didn't write anything and I feel obligated to do so. And let me tell you, obligation is about as appealing to me a chocolate-covered cockroach. Let me be clear - when I say I feel obligated, it's not because I'm laboring under the delusion that my tens of readers are dying every day I don't post; it's just feels like posting on a regular basis is something I should be doing. So I was discussing this predicament with a very wise friend of mine when VWF posed this question to me;

"In general, don't you pretty much do what you want to do, when you want to do it?"

"Um, well...in general, yes."

"Well why should your blog be any different? Write when you want to write. Don't write when you don't want to. It shouldn't be that damn complicated."

"........"

"Now can we go get a drink?"

I stood there for a moment like my VWF had just solved one of the great mysteries of life. And ever since VWF said it, I haven't felt obligated to write at all. And the funny part is that as soon as that feeling of obligation went away, all I want to do is write. Go figure. So despite the fact that I just got home from a Super Bowl party and I'm exhausted and I have the seal-bark cough, I walked into my office to write...about how I wasn't sure I wanted to write anymore...but then had an epiphany that I didn't have to if I didn't want to...and so now I'm writing again.

And with that synaptic misfire I ask you, aren't you happy I'm back?

Update on the Kleptomaniac

I emailed the blogging bandit (Cheryl says she doesn't warrant capitalization and I agree) the same day I put the last post up. I asked her to please stop using my stuff as her own and to remove all posts she had previously stolen. I told her if I found anything else of mine on her blog I would not only post a link to her blog but also her email address. Then I may have thrown around a few words I learned in law school. (Sidebar: Gmail needs to come up with an emoticon that conveys "shaking fist in righteous indignation" because that would have come in handy for my email to her.) She never responded but when I checked this morning, her entire blog was gone. Just gone. Not just my posts but the whole damn thing. Wanna hear the stupid part? For a fraction of a millisecond, I felt bad. I sort of pictured her reading my email and just freaking right the fuck out. And then I thought maybe I took it all just a bit too far. I thought maybe I'd been too confrontational - as I've been known to do from time to time.

Until...

I started getting comment and emails from you guys and I realized I wasn't the only one who thought what this girl did was total crap. Like a bunch of angry villagers with torches and pitchforks, you guys wanted a piece of her. And then I realized I had nothing to feel bad about. If she wanted to take down the whole thing, that wasn't my fault. A friend pointed out that perhaps she was worried someone would post things on her blog about the whole situation and so she just did away with it.

Anyway, the thing that killed me was seeing comments that people had posted about one of my posts giving her credit for it. She stole one of my all time favorites and people were telling her what a great writer she was. And I was sitting there yelling at my computer screen that she was nothing but a...say it with me...thieving ho.

So, the good news is, it's all over. But man, if she (or anyone else) does it again I'm unleashing you guys on her because for a girl who values loyalty the way I do, I was tickled pink at your reactions. You are not people I would want to piss off.

Did I mention I love you for that? 'Cause I do.

If This Blog were McDonalds, She'd be the Hamburglar

I have this blog because I like to write. I never said I was any good at it and I never said that every post was a literary masterpiece. I never said I was a writer...I'm just a girl who likes to write.

That being said, I always get a kick when I see someone has been reading a lot of my posts in one sitting. When that happens I often wonder if they're just really bored or if they actually like what they're reading.

I was checking Sitemeter today as I'm known to do rather frequently because dammit, if people are gonna lurk I want to at least know where they are and what posts their reading. (Yes, I realize this makes me 8 shades of lame but I'm ok with that.) A craptastic thing happened today when I was checking out Sitemeter. It took me to a blog with several posts that I'd seen before - ON MY BLOG.

I had several reactions to this discovery.
Reaction 1 - "What the fu*k?!"
Reaction 2 - "Why didn't this theiving ho steal from a REAL writer instead of me?"
Reaction 3 - "Well, they do say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery..."
Reaction 4 - "Screw that last diplomatic reaction. This girl is passing off my writing as her own - typos and all."
Reaction 5 - "Ok Kendra, find your happy place. Perhaps she was fresh out of ideas of her own and she merely wanted to borrow a few of yours."
Reaction 6 - "Help the girl out with her next post."

And so for the Blogging Bandit I've put together a few words you are free to use as your own...

I am lame and the only creativity I have is held in my ability to cut and paste.