I need your help.
Mr. Normal wants to read the blog. He's been aware of its existence for a while but during a conversation last week he asked if he was ever going to be allowed to read it.
I've gone back and forth on this decision and decided it would be best left up to the loyal readers. I know there are some of you who read daily but never comment but I think today would be a banner day to start commenting...I've opened comments up to everyone. And for those of you who do comment, let me know your thoughts. I've never let anyone I was dating read the blog...then again, since the beginning of the blog, I haven't dated anyone long enough to even think about letting them read it. Anyone with experience in this area, your feedback would be nice.
This is not a blogocracy so I may not go the way of the vote but I'd like to see what you all think.
23 comments:
Let him in...after any incriminating past entries are edited or deleted of course. (Only those about him, not saying you should edit yourself completely to fit some weird perfect ideal of a person...not that you're not ideal.)
And then delete this comment so the trail is completely hidden.
I'm happy to be the first voter in the blogocracy, or dictatorship if it turns out that way.
I think that if he's going to be in your life, he's going to eventually read the blog anyway (most likely). That said, you should just let him in. It sounds like you've been honest since the beginning, and you haven't given up much in this blog about him, so I think it's harmless and kind of fun.
Go on, open the door!
By not giving up anything, I meant nothing incriminating, just nice, Normal things. Sweet things.
I think you should let him read it. Remember how you were gonna try to share yourself?
And he seems like a good guy so I think he will get it all.
And you've always said good things about him here too.
I vote yes.
Okay if i say let him in - you'll close him out. Why? Because that's whay we do. But let's break it down to the bare facts of what could happen if you let him in. There is nothing where you are sounding like a 13 year old with a crush. It's all about the moments where he makes you feel warm and fuzzy. At this stage maybe he needs reassurance just as much as you do or maybe it's just that he you need sexy lingerie and he wants to get to know you better.
Err..once again, i said a lot without saying anything.
Point of Clarification: My hesitation in letting him read has less to do with anything I've written about him and more to do with the fact that letting him read this would REALLY be letting him in. And yes, I said I would share more but this might be an overshare. :) Also, if things don't work out, I hate the thought of him continuing to read.
Hmm. I vote No. Just to be difficult. :) If you think letting him read the blog will limit you on processing this relationship in a safe environment, I wouldn't do it. If you have other outlets for that, then you can let him read it.
And BTW, it is sooooo satisfying when you see your ex reading your blog regularly. Not that I'd know...
If you think he is the real deal - go for it.
Thanks for the great Blog..
I agree with Beck -- I think if you let him read it, you'll censor yourself, whether consciously or unconsciously. You shouldn't have to delete any entries about him or worry about talking about things on your mind that you think he might not like. It's still early -- I'd wait a while longer...
NO! Don't do it. You should've never let him know you had a blog. But I'm weird. And I'm mentally ill. What Amber said. Except the part where it's too early. That implies that you should let him in in time. You shouldn't. Never.
Depends on if he is TRULY a keeper. If he is..I say go for it! If you're still unsure no way!
Do it. He's going to find it (and you at your essence) eventually so might as well put it out on the table and get it over with. And from the sounds of him, he's going to receive it all with open arms.
Before Sir H and my family discovered my blog I could write more freely than I can now. I want to write how I feel, what I am thinking, where I once was, where I thinking I am going. I have to think twice about what I write, "If I write this will it hurt anyone?" Sometimes the answer is yes so I do not write it, other times the answer is yes and I think bu**ger it I have to write it anyway! That is the downside.
The upside is I now know they knew/know most of it anyway just that I had never said it out loud before. What they did not/do not know they love finding out. Sir H likes to read what I write, he loves that I blog and he enjoys reading my blog. Sir H never mentions what he has read to me - we have a rule and that is if I want to discuss it I will raise the subject.
This probably has not helped much but what I think I am saying is let him read it because now he knows about it he will do anyway. If he is the one than there is nothing here that will make any difference and will only help to bring you closer together.
that is a TOUGH one kendra!!! okay...so you could let him read it, but are you ready for that step? i mean, i know that sounds silly, but i've regretted giving out this site to certain people over the years b/c all of a sudden you get nervous about what's in your archives, and you start to censor yourself, too. but that's just me. (then again, i say that, and i continue to give out the link!)
so...i guess i would give it (in the spirit of being open and honest with guys we like - tough for us i know!), but be ready for the censoring to start! ;)
Wow, the group is pretty divided. Hmmmm, I'm going to think on for a little while. But thanks to everyone who put in their two cents. And to the new commenters -thanks for reading! :)
I appreciate you polling people - I think this is a tough decision for any blogger to make. Wow I sound serious... Let us know if you end up sharing it and how it goes.
Sorry I'm late to the discussion, Kendra, but I think you should keep on thinking. As much as you want to let him in, the blog might be your safe place to get feedback from those close gals of yours plus a bunch of strangers who have really grown to care about you. Because my blog is part of my writing samples, everyone in my life knows about it, and that truly does limit me in some cases. If you want to let him into this part of you, I would actually suggest printing out some of those lovely things you have written about him and giving them to him. That way, he sees a new side of you, he gets validation for all the good feelings he has given you, and you can preserve this place as your private spot a while longer.
Oh, and let me add, in my experience, men are beyond flattered when you share with them something you have written that makes them look like "the man". Even one excerpt can go a long way toward making him feel really, really special and bringing the two of you closer together.
Let him ONLY if it won't stop you from blogging the way you already do!
Have decided that giving him the whole thing isn't what I want to do right now. Jill suggested that I let him read certain ones that I pick which seems like a nice compromise - not keeping him out entirely but not giving away the farm either.
Thanks to everyone who commented and gave their thoughts - I appreciated your ideas so much!
Greetings from Wolsztyn, Wielkopolska, Poland. I wish I understood Englih to be able to comment more on your page. Oh well, maybe I can learn :)
i just found your page and have completely enjoyed your writings. it would be a shame if you had to censor your thoughts.
have to admit i am glad you decided on only giving him certain select things. there is something magical about learning new things about the person we are involved with...it would give him too much too fast if he read your entire blog.
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